August 9

There is a certain amount of anticipation that goes along with hot mornings and loud pop music that precedes a wedding. Today is the start of a 2 day wedding ceremony for Kwasi and Tashi’s daughter, Maggie. A table and rows of chairs have beens et up under a red and yellow striped tarp and everything waits in quiet anticipation. Even the children are anxious, dressed in their little dresses and dress pants.

The ceremony began with the welcoming of the grooms family, the bride’s family, the chairmen of the Unity Drumming Group, and the students from Canada. After a few speeches, the groom’s family went into the house to inspect the dowery, which was wrapped in golden paper inside the veranda. The MC held a list of inventory of all the items that were expected to be there, and they went through it in careful detail. There was a lot of alcohol and pop, a walking stick and sandals for the grooms father, cloth for his mother and a suitcase full of clothes for the couple.  There was a heated discussion when it was discovered that the rings were packed in the suitcase. The minister insisted that they were needed for the ceremony, so the suitcase was unwrapped and the rings were found.

Back at the tent, the groom was asked a series of public questions. Was he single? Did he wish to marry? Then he was asked to pay a transportation fee to bring his bride to him, and he asked how much more for express? Everyone laughed.

The bride entered with her attendants, wearing a brown and gold dress that was of the same material as the groom’s. Long black hair and a huge golden headdress, and of course a beaming smile. She was also asked questions, and then she was asked to produce her dowry. She went to the veranda with her attendants and brought back a bottle of Champaign and several bottles of schnapps. She poured a glass of Champaign for her husband and poured a little on the ground. She fed it to him and he did the same for her. Then the schnapps was poured into a calabash, and everyone important went off to the cobblestones to pour the liabation. Then the minister gave a short service in Ewe. I didn’t understand it, but it had the same tone as a southern Baptist preacher. Lastly was the exchange of rings and the presentation of the couple.

Dowry seems to be a tradition in every culture. In this case, it is very clearly the bride’s family paying the groom in kind for taking their daughter. In our culture, wedding gifts are a big thing. And they seem to be some kind of spin off or cheap coverup of the dowry tradition. But in our culture, the payment it to the bride and groom from all of the guests. We also have an inventory ceremony in the form of opening the gifts. We make a list of who gave what so we can mail out a long list of thank you cards. It seems that some of the deepest set traditions of all cultures are preserved in weddings.